I heard Jay Abraham say that you can have all the systems, techniques, dialogues and methods in the world but if you don’t have the right mindset, all that strategic stuff doesn’t matter.
I believe him and so can you because mindset is the place from which you come, it’s your ground of being, it’s who you are when you're applying a specific strategy.
During my 25 years of teaching people how to build a referral-based business I have always noticed that the people who were least successful were the ones who just wanted the techniques without embracing the mindset. So to ensure your long-term success it’s essential that you embrace these seven concepts. The sooner you can feel good about the process of getting referrals, the sooner you will become highly referable.
So let's invest the time upfront to install these seven concepts as you continue developing your referral mindset.
Notice it’s another mnemonics spelling: R-E-F-E-R-R-A-L
Realize
Realize that the primary purpose of your business is referral. Walt Disney said, “My goal is for a person to come to Disneyland, and love the experience so much that they go home, tell a friend, and come back with that friend."
Isn’t that what Jesus did? He spoke on the side of a hill and delivered a message so compelling that people went home, told the people they loved that they needed to hear this man speak, and the next day they brought a friend. He built his business on referral. If you could pick only one word to describe the purpose of your business, a good word would be “Referral.” The name of my company is By Referral Only. We like to say that the definition of a referral is sending someone you care about to someone you trust. That is all the mission statement you will ever need to create profit, great service, and lots of happy clients.
So the next time a person asks you what is the purpose of your business, smile and say, “Referral.”
Empower
Empower yourself to work only with people who like to work with you. Here is an exercise I ask my real estate and mortgage clients to do that empowers them to work with people who honor and revere them. I call it the "Ideal Client" exercise
It’s simple and fun to do.
Step one is to create a “Top 10" people list. This is a list of the 10 people you have helped, that you feel best about. As you're writing their names, notice how you feel. Only list the 10 people who give you a feeling of happiness, joy and peace.
Now imagine your 10 Ideal Clients morph into one person. What specifically are the 10 combined attributes that you admire most?
The secret is to make a list of the 10 specific behaviors, attitudes and mindsets that the 10 people have as the qualities that make up your Ideal Client.
Here is my list of the qualities that make up my Ideal Client:
1.They are referred to me.
2.They allow me and want me to be the expert.
3.They trust me.
4.They listen openly to my guidance and direction.
5.They have complete faith me.
6.They inspire me to do my best work for them.
7.They value my time and never question my intentions.
8.They love paying me.
9.They believe that I always do my homework.
10.They want to introduce me to the people they love.
Now make up your list and keep a copy on you at all times. Do your best to read your list 3 times a day, maybe in the morning upon awakening, midday during your break and before you go to bed at night.
I have noticed that whatever I focus on increases, and nothing will change your life more than the people you attract into your life.
Focus
Focus on using the Magic Words That Get Referrals and watch as you generate more and more. You might be wondering why do I call it Magic Words?
I call the words you're learning Magic Words because they are words you already know, words that you use every day but up till now you may not have had them in the right combination.
It’s a little bit like saying you know all the numbers 0 to 9, and if you have a safe in front of you that is loaded with your heart's desire, the only way to get into the safe is to know the combination.
When you know the combination you can unlock it and reach in and get what you want. The 52 dialogues contained inside the deck of cards work the same way. You will quickly notice that each script has embedded in it certain combinations of words that make it easy and fun to remember and more importantly, are highly effective when you use them in your daily conversations.
Establish
Establish a powerful set of boundaries and communicate them clearly. An essential shift that you will make in your journey to becoming highly referable is from salesperson to consultant. The biggest difference between a salesperson and a consultant is the ground rules that they apply to their relationship with their clients.
For example, a ground rule that a By Referral Only consultant operates under is a clear understanding in advance that referrals/introductions/recommendations are the lifeblood of their business. You will learn to communicate powerfully that you build your business based on a set of principles that result in a client wanting to be a raving fan for your services, and you as a person.
The typical salesperson may operate under a principle that it would be nice of people to refer, and more than likely it will be accidental rather than intentional if they did.
Because you have chosen to make the shift from salesperson to consultant you have a new rule, which is you don’t wing it anymore, you master the Magic Words That Get Referrals because that is the purpose of your business.
Resolve
Resolve to make no more excuses.
Believe that everyone can introduce you to someone. I love that thought that everyone knows someone and that you have to let go of all your old, worn-out excuses for why people don’t refer you at the rate that makes your dreams come true.
When you make up an excuse you give up responsibility and you become a victim of the market.
Well, those days are over now, because equipped with dialogues you will always know what to say, when to say it, and how to say it so you get more referrals than you ever imagined getting. What's it feel like when you imagine yourself giving up all the excuses for not getting referrals?
Run
Run your business as if what others think about you makes no difference!
Have you ever noticed that as soon as you make a commitment to a particular way of thinking that all the naysayers come out against you? Believe me, everyone wants to give you advice, including me, but here is the difference. Only take advice from people who have the same mindset. So if a person suggests that you do business a particular way, you ask them, “In one word what would you say is the purpose of your business?”
If they say anything else than "Referral," thank them for their input and turn the other way.
The only advice you want is from people who are like-minded. When someone who has a different mindset than yours makes a strong argument as to why you should change, quote Gandhi and say "You may be right." And you also have permission to say, "You have your way of doing things and I honor that; I have my way of doing things and I know you honor that. And after all, what you think about me is none of my business." Those are Magic Words because they will make that person disappear.
Advise
Advise your clients without ever compromising your integrity.
One of the easiest ways to strengthen your integrity is to stabilize your business so you don’t need any one client. That means that when you don’t need a client because you have a consistent, predictable, reliable flow of new business, you can give clients the type of advice they want and need from you without ever thinking you are suggesting they do something that benefits you more than them.
I remember working with a local agent in San Diego and I asked him about his commission and he said, “Joe I don’t make this much money on every transaction, just yours." From that moment forward I was suspect of him because he had his self-interest ahead of mine. If he was really interested in me he would have said, "Joe, if you are questioning my value to you, let's talk about that because I want you to be so delighted with the help I give you that you will gladly introduce me to at least 2 people before I even sell your house."
That response has integrity and is loaded with Magic Words. Integrity comes from your solid foundation of language.
Language that you will learn, that will give you the confidence to communicate exactly what you always wanted to say but didn’t have the right combination of words until now.
Love
Love to help with an open heart, even when your client’s heart is closed. I love that thought. Love is expression of compassion, love is a verb, it’s an action, and it’s the way you care enough about your client that you are willing to help them discover their true desires. You have heard me rant about this in the past, but people don’t care what you know until they know that you care…caring is a form of love. Recognize this fact: Today people are being bombarded by real estate and mortgage pornography, stuff is blasted on radio talk shows, CNN, the local newspaper, and the messages are not about love, they're about fear…if love and fear are really the only true emotions and everything else is a hue of that, I wonder which side are you shading towards… Choose Love.
For more than 20 years Joe Stumpf has trained and coached the most successful real estate and mortgage professionals in North America on the systems and strategies for building a highly profitable referral-based business. Joe Stumpf's By Referral Only provides you with expert coaching, turnkey business systems and revenue-generating marketing strategies so you can absolutely dominate your market.
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